Went to bed at 4:oo am this morning after a forensic file marathon. Slept for awhile and got up for a rip roaring good time...playing with the cats. The picture is of Gentry. He was hamming it up for the camera. I was very proud of him.
Did not do anything profound, profundity went away with another life of mine. Wish I could say I've something important but I don't. I guess that is one thing that bums me out on days like this. I just get frustrated not having a particular purpose to my life. I hate it when people ask me what's up or what's new or what's going on. The answer is always 'nothing.' Oh I guess I could go volunteer somewhere, but it pales so drastically with what I want. Oh well, I do find myself interested in volunteering with the AA stuff. I have that to look forward to anyway.
Then there is the fact that this evening we spend with Mom and watch movies and then go to Mass the next morning. It is a pleasure to go over to Mom's, she is such a fiesty person. Then there is Tiger who likes to get Mom riled up. I just hope Tiger doesn't bug Mom too much tonight...I'm really not in the mood. The whole point of spending the night with mOm is that we get time to enjoy her while she is still alive. Come the time she passes on, I will have no reason for regrets. I look at my co-worker, DitzyLady, and see the regrets she has with her mother. She frequently wishes she had done things differently. I hope I won't have those kinds of regrets. I mean I know I have made mistakes in my life that I regret; but as for being there for her last years (even if it is for 20 years) I won't have made that mistake. I will have spent good times with Mom doing simple things that we enjoy, making her happy. that has to count for something in the great cosmic world. And maybe that is my purpose in life. Perhaps my job is to "be there" for family members and friends...which is everyone's purpose in life. Which makes me not so special which leads me to another topic which I should save for another day.
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